This Is A Custom Widget

This Sliding Bar can be switched on or off in theme options, and can take any widget you throw at it or even fill it with your custom HTML Code. Its perfect for grabbing the attention of your viewers. Choose between 1, 2, 3 or 4 columns, set the background color, widget divider color, activate transparency, a top border or fully disable it on desktop and mobile.

This Is A Custom Widget

This Sliding Bar can be switched on or off in theme options, and can take any widget you throw at it or even fill it with your custom HTML Code. Its perfect for grabbing the attention of your viewers. Choose between 1, 2, 3 or 4 columns, set the background color, widget divider color, activate transparency, a top border or fully disable it on desktop and mobile.

This Is A Custom Widget

This Sliding Bar can be switched on or off in theme options, and can take any widget you throw at it or even fill it with your custom HTML Code. Its perfect for grabbing the attention of your viewers. Choose between 1, 2, 3 or 4 columns, set the background color, widget divider color, activate transparency, a top border or fully disable it on desktop and mobile.

This Is A Custom Widget

This Sliding Bar can be switched on or off in theme options, and can take any widget you throw at it or even fill it with your custom HTML Code. Its perfect for grabbing the attention of your viewers. Choose between 1, 2, 3 or 4 columns, set the background color, widget divider color, activate transparency, a top border or fully disable it on desktop and mobile.

This Is A Custom Widget

This Sliding Bar can be switched on or off in theme options, and can take any widget you throw at it or even fill it with your custom HTML Code. Its perfect for grabbing the attention of your viewers. Choose between 1, 2, 3 or 4 columns, set the background color, widget divider color, activate transparency, a top border or fully disable it on desktop and mobile.

This Is A Custom Widget

This Sliding Bar can be switched on or off in theme options, and can take any widget you throw at it or even fill it with your custom HTML Code. Its perfect for grabbing the attention of your viewers. Choose between 1, 2, 3 or 4 columns, set the background color, widget divider color, activate transparency, a top border or fully disable it on desktop and mobile.

This Is A Custom Widget

This Sliding Bar can be switched on or off in theme options, and can take any widget you throw at it or even fill it with your custom HTML Code. Its perfect for grabbing the attention of your viewers. Choose between 1, 2, 3 or 4 columns, set the background color, widget divider color, activate transparency, a top border or fully disable it on desktop and mobile.

This Is A Custom Widget

This Sliding Bar can be switched on or off in theme options, and can take any widget you throw at it or even fill it with your custom HTML Code. Its perfect for grabbing the attention of your viewers. Choose between 1, 2, 3 or 4 columns, set the background color, widget divider color, activate transparency, a top border or fully disable it on desktop and mobile.

Six Things I Hate About Being A Woman In China

1

 

Here in Shanghai, we’ve got it better than a lot of women in the world. I took a business trip to Saudi Arabia last year and was like, “Damn, at least I can drive in China.” We’ve still got a ways to go, though. Sure, ladies in Shanghai can walk home alone at 2am no problem, but we still deal with all kinds of máfan and outdated thinking. Lemme tell you about the struggles we face on the daily.

 

perioddrama

Most stores here don’t even sell tampons because girls are afraid they’ll ruin their vagina and never find a husband. The few that do only sell one brand, unless you’re at some yuppie supermarket where a box of tampons costs more than a whole birthday cake.

Oh it’s late and the drug store is closed? The convenience store definitely doesn’t have any medicine for your cramps, but they do have a whole shelf of maxi pads. Gross. I hate walking into a public restroom and finding a used maxi pad just chillin on the top of the wastebin like an open-face sandwich. And while we’re on that topic…

 

ladiesroom

Oh you found a western toilet? Bet the seat is drenched in pee from that girl who squats over the seat or stands on it because she’s afraid of catching an infection and becoming infertile.

 

bullshitadvice

When they’re not glaring at our subtle cleavage or making that judgey face, a lot of elders just love to tell us how to live. Even worse, a lot of you girls take their advice! I’m just like, “Sorry Āyí, I can’t hear you across this cultural gap.” The minute you turn 25, they start asking why you’re not married with kids. Then they call you fat to your face. Countryside sisters get it even worse.

And when you finally do pop out a baby, they tell you to zuò yuèzi. Like, “you can’t brush your teeth or wash your hair for one month, or your teeth will fall out, your husband will lust for other women, and you’ll get headaches FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE!”

 

Love Bang Parents Just Dont Understand

I got this friend who’s a techno DJ. Her ex-boyfriend didn’t introduce her to his family even after they dated for two years. His parents think any girl who works in nightlife is automatically a prostitute. But if they knew the deal, they’d know there’s some nice girls in the club and some real hoes in the office.

 

respect

Guys are always trying to pay for everything and treat us like pets. That’s disrespectful. One dude tried to give me an iPhone on our second date. I was like, a) I’ve got my own money, and b) I’ve already got an iPhone 7, and I don’t trust girls with two phones. They always seem like they’re up to something.

 

mensexpectations

Men expect us to be all warm, soft and thin. They want us to talk sweetly and keep our opinions limited to “Kě’ài” and “Hǎo a, lǎogōng.” Look, it’s bad enough when dudes don’t take me seriously in business meetings, but the absolute worst is when they’re like “nice to meet you” and then give me a girly-ass, limp-wristed handshake.

It feels like I’m shaking hands with a kitten. Sisters, you know what I’m talking about!

 

Look, I could go on and on about how we only have three color choices for foundation (Nope, “ivory yellow” is not working for me) or the kinds of married dudes that try to holler, but I wanna know how you feel. Drop it in the comments honey.

– Relationship Counselor Rabbit

 

Want more surreal lifestyle content? Peep our Instagram and scan the QR to follow our WeChat account.

LoveBangFollowTheCats

By | 2017-11-07T07:49:32+00:00 March 29th, 2017|Categories: Stories|0 Comments

You Sound Girly AF When You Speak Mandarin

lovebangrabbitinabar

Foreign dudes are always trying to holler at me. I just have that look. And one move that gets them rejected every single time is when they come at me with some girly-ass Mandarin.

When you drop that “Duì a!” or say some shit like, “Nǐ sì bù sì Sànghǎirén?” I can already tell what you’re all about. I know your history. I know what kind of folks you’ve been hanging around these last few years while you’ve been finding yourself in China.

It’s not happening honey.

But to help you in life, in business, and in love, I’m gonna school you on six ways to avoid sounding so damn soft when you’re trying to spit some huà. Of course, if you want to sound like a Taiwanese Princess, that’s on you, but it’s weird and confusing when you’re supposedly straight.

LoveBangMandarinRules1

Worst. You don’t live in “Zōngsān Gōngyuán” – you live in “Zhōngshān gōngyuán”. And no, we’re never going to “yīqǐ cìfan”. Now go home and watch some TF Boys videos. Bye.

 

LoveBangMandarinRules2

You probably learned those phrases like “Wǒ è sǐle” and “Wǒ xiǎng sǐ nǐle” from Vivian at the English corner. Forget them like you forget her..

 

LoveBangMandarinRules3

Dudes saying “Duì a” is a major turnoff. You’re much better off just saying “duì” or “N.” (Or just say nothing at all and silently affirm like a cab driver).

 

LoveBangMandarinRules4

Not even once. Zhīdàole o?

 

LoveBangMandarinRules5

One time this investment banker bro told me, “Bùyào zèyàng la!” and I spit my drink in his face.

 

LoveBangMandarinRules6

Not if you’re a grown-ass man arguing with a bǎo’ān about where you can park your scooter. PS I don’t wanna ride on your scooter and I hope the cops take it.

 

bonus

Nine times out of ten, you’re dropping terms like “lǜchá biǎo” two years too late and way out of context. Stop trying.

Look honey, I’m just telling you what everyone else is too polite to tell you. Believe me, I’m not the only one who feels like this. Real sisters, you know what I’m talking about.

– Relationship Counselor Rabbit

xx

FollowTheCatsWebWe drop articles like this every week on our WeChat, so scan that QR!

By | 2017-11-07T07:49:32+00:00 March 7th, 2017|Categories: LB Comix, Stories|Tags: |0 Comments

Hong Kong Disco Mixtape: Cantopop Night Mode

LoveBangCantopopNightMode

Hey fam here’s our brand new tape of some classic-but-rare ’80s Hong Kong disco, selected and mixed by DJ 小卖部. This music is like synthpop with Cantonese lyrics and melodies that get stuck in your head for days. No tracklist for now, but some of the artists include 陈慧娴 (Chén Huìxián), 柏安妮 (Bǎi’ ānnī), and Raidas. Here’s the story:

“On the evening of Lantern Festival 2017, a Shanghai street cat named Xu Dongmei ate some tangyuan she found in the park and had a flashback to a dark disco night in Hong Kong circa 1988. The trip only lasted 30 minutes but she’ll never forget those neon lights…”

And if Soundcloud doesn’t work for you, you can listen and download right here – even on mobile.

Cantopop Night Mode | 爱到爆炸

By | 2017-11-07T07:49:32+00:00 February 14th, 2017|Categories: Music|0 Comments

Love Bang Universe Tour Spring 2017

ORIGINALLoveBangUniverseTourPoster640

alldates640

Hey fam we’re taking off on a ten-city tour this Thursday. We need some advice on street food in all these cities – hit us up at holler

[AT] lovebanguniverse [DOT] com if you’ve got some knowledge. See you in the club, and stay tuned to our Instagram and WeChat for crucial dispatches from the road.

By | 2017-11-07T07:49:32+00:00 February 13th, 2017|Categories: Events|0 Comments
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